We’ve all had one of those days.
Everything seems to go wrong. You forget you’re out of coffee then the kids drag their tails getting ready for school, and just when you think the day is improving, the internet takes a dive during an important Zoom meeting.
Sometimes you just wake up on the wrong side of the bed for no apparent reason.
Whatever the cause, it’s no fun to be in a bad mood.
So how do you transform a bad day into a good day? Is it possible to get out of a funk?
In my house, the reality is that my mood often determines everyone else’s. If I wallow in my bad day then pretty soon my family will be on the bad mood bandwagon and then things feel exponentially worse.
Here are nine tricks to help you transform your terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day into a good day.
1 | Eat something.
We’re not talking about eating your feelings. While food can be a source of immediate comfort, studies show that eating in response to negative mood doesn’t help the feelings go away.
On the other hand, boosting your blood sugar can help when you’re feeling crabby or irritable. The word “hangry” is now in the dictionary for a reason.
When you haven’t eaten in a while, your blood sugar decreases, and your cells become starved for energy, making you feel tired and cranky.
Try eating a snack to help balance your blood sugar and give your mood a jumpstart.
*Mom Tip: somewhere around age 10-12 most kids start hitting that magical phase called puberty and they will eat everything. If your kiddo seems overly obnoxious after school, a snack can help snap them out of it.
2 | Transform a bad day with music.
It’s hard to be a grump when you’re listening to something upbeat.
Throw on some headphones or have an impromptu dance party if you’re at home. Not only will your spirits be lifted, but you’ll feel more energized as well.
Personally, some old-school Mariah Carey always does it for me, but whatever style of music you like, blast it for five minutes and “Shake It Off” (see what I did there).
*Mom Tip: when your kiddos are in a funk, let them pick the song that they think will make them feel better.
3 | Slow down and do one thing at a time.
It’s easy to get frustrated and overwhelmed when you’re trying to do too many things at once. Especially as moms, we’re used to being pulled in multiple directions so we start to think that multi-tasking is normal.
The truth is that multitasking is only effective when only one task requires certain parts of your brain. Folding laundry and watching Netflix… totally doable. Listening to a podcast while washing dishes… not an issue.
The problem arises when we try to do tasks that require our attention in two ways at once. Listening to a child while reading an email? Nope. Talking on the phone while checking someone’s homework? Try again.
If trying to do too much at once makes you a massive crankster, hit the emergency break. Take a few deep breaths. Focus your attention on one task (or person) at a time.
If it’s work that’s making you crazy, find a moment to press pause. Close your eyes (in private so you don’t look like someone who’s about to burn the place down) and breathe.
Address one issue at a time and you’ll start to feel better almost immediately.
4 | Call a friend and let it out.
Sometimes you just need someone to listen.
The kids are bickering nonstop, your partner has to work late, and you just need a break. Call a friend who will let you vent without judgment.
Releasing your frustration to a friend is better than unleashing on your kids who don’t understand why mom is so fired up. Remember we want to turn a bad day into a good day not turn a bad day into an “I feel guilty for yelling at my kids and I’m the worst mom ever” day.
Plus a friend can help you see that you’re not the only mom who’s ever reached her limit and that alone will usually make you feel better.
5 | Get a move on.
Exercise is known for releasing endorphins, the hormone that relieves pain and stress. While this is true, there’s more than just endorphins in play when you work out.
You also get a stream of dopamine and serotonin. Dopamine is known as the “feel-good” hormone that’s part of the brain’s reward system and serotonin helps regulate your mood. Both are a big help when you feel like you’re about to blow your stack.
Exercise also helps balance stress hormones like adrenaline that amp up your body’s fight or flight response. I wrote about how getting regular exercise was one of the things that worked for me in 2023 and stress-release is a huge reason.
Even just the act of focusing on the exercise itself, whether the physical strain or specific movements, can be a distraction from whatever is bringing you down and help transform that bad day into a good one.
Take a quick walk around the block or bust out that upbeat music from tip #2 and have that spontaneous dance party.
Get the kids involved and go for a bike ride or a swim. Kick the soccer ball around the yard. You get a boost of happy hormones plus the bonus of feeling like a fun mom. Win win.
6 | Take a time-out.
When your kids are little it’s hard to check out at any point when they’re awake. But once your kids are older, they can be left alone for a bit while you take a short break.
Go outside or to another room with the door closed.
Scroll through Instagram, read a book, close your eyes and have a power nap (probably set an alarm just to be safe), or do whatever else takes you out of your immediate situation.
Sometimes even five minutes of not being needed or asked for something is enough to hit the reset button.
*Mom Tip: This is a great opportunity for impromptu screen time while you go to another room and regroup. If that makes you feel too guilty to relax (which it shouldn’t), I’m a big fan of telling my kids they need to do their twenty minutes of reading for school.
7 | Do something kind or helpful for someone else.
Take the focus off of yourself to help clear up a bad mood in a hurry.
Compliment another mom on her cute bag at the store. Tell the checker at the grocery store how much you love her manicure.
Buy coffee for a friend or surprise a neighbor with flowers. Even sending a nice text out of the blue can give you a boost.
Studies show that the act of giving can trigger the areas of the brain associated with positive feelings and reduce feelings of stress.
Try it. You’ll be surprised how good you feel after handing out a simple compliment to an unsuspecting stranger.
8 | Practice speaking affirmations to yourself.
If a friend told you she was having a rough day and feeling frazzled, what would you say?
Would you tell her to get it together and stop being so lazy or disorganized? Maybe you’d say she’s probably not a very good mom because her kid was late to a sports practice. Would you agree that if she was a better wife she would have dinner on the table on time?
Of course not. You wouldn’t say any of these things to your friend. So why do you say them to yourself?
We have such high expectations for ourselves. We act like we’re supposed to be all the things to all the people and never make mistakes.
And when things don’t go as planned or our day feels like a runaway train, we beat ourselves up with all sorts of negative self-talk.
Try speaking to yourself the way you would to another mom. Give yourself a small percentage of the grace you would happily bestow on anyone else.
Here are a few affirmations to try on the days that feel like a dumpster fire:
- It’s not my job to be perfect but to love my family well.
- I do not need to do it all and it’s okay to ask for help.
- I am a good mom because I love my kids, not because of what I do for them.
- Today I will do my best and that is enough.
9 | Laughter is the best medicine.
Sometimes all it takes to transform a bad day is a good laugh. Aside from the fact that it’s a distraction from whatever real life is throwing at you, it has actual health benefits.
Laughter reduces stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol and increases the feel-good hormones like the endorphins you get from exercise.
One of the benefits of having the internet at our fingertips is we can find silly cat videos or clips of our favorite comedians online at any time. A personal favorite is Nate Bargatze who is not only funny but also kid-friendly.
It stinks to feel like Debbie Downer so try one of these tips the next time you’re in a funk. You can’t always control how your day goes, but you can control your reaction.
Try one of these tricks the next time you need to turn a bad day into a good day!